I have a successful doggy daycare and boarding business, but it’s too early to sell. I was never an emotionally stable person, but it’s only gotten so much worse. The fears, judgements, and the responsibility associated with my business eat at my soul every single day. I can’t catch a break with things going wrong left and right. Finances are fine, could be better at 1st location but stuck in a standstill. I can’t take the gossip and drama. I’m just one little girl (okay, I’m 33, but still feel like I have too much responsibility on my hands and I don’t know how much longer I can take the pain of it all). I have the constant fear of employees making deadly mistakes (since I always get the repercussions of my employees). People definitely hold these businesses to a higher stature when it comes to mistakes. It is a way less forgiving industry, compared to let’s say having a bad meal at a restaurant. We make mistakes, we’re all human, but the mistakes this year have been out of control. I’ve made my own mistakes that shot me in the foot too. I just want to give up. I take it all so personally. But I have or I’m on track to have everything I’ve ever wanted. If only I was someone that could cope with stress better, and be someone that doesn’t care what people think, I’d probably be fine.

Is anyone else in a super high stress field and/or gets suicidal thoughts over something so stupid as their business/job? I’ve had plenty of stressful jobs before this. I’ve hated plenty of jobs. But it was always as simple as: I could just quit and get another job. Now I’ve been spoiled with having the luxury of a more flexible schedule that I love, I would hate going back to a job. My home is where my business is. I have 1m in real estate/loan debt for the business. While I love living in this scenic place where I work, I also sometimes wish I could just be homeless backpacking the world again. I just want to walk out and quit. And I don’t even feel like waiting to do it the right way. I just want to up and leave and go bankrupt and let everything fall apart on it’s own. Sometimes I contemplate running away with the loan money I just took out for more construction. What if I just hide it and go bankrupt and live in a hut in some country and start over?